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Tuesday, August 12, 2008
aiya, you all know me and how when my mind stirs i can't go to bed. need to sort my mind out first.
hmm, the thought that is forbidding me sleep is the whole notion of trust. i read some thing thing from anthony robbins about it and to resolve it, fix it or whatever you call it sounds real easy, but in real life, its life size and hits you straight at your weakest spot. there are people in our lives who we wish to trust, but d aren't; those we just naturally do and over time grow to trust more and those who just plaintively do not deserve our trust. and the point in which we feel as if we're in a rut, is most often when we desperately wish to trust someone but circumstances have provided enough reasons not to. but against better reason and maybe for greater things like love or friendship, there just may be enough reasons to keep on fighting. aiya, i suck la, i suck for being so freaking sentimental. and it's not my fault i'm not demonstrative with my efforts. sometimes subtle is the way to go ya know? hahaha but it breaks my heart when the people i love most don't trust me. hahahaha clearly this space has trust goin on.. hehehehehe.. but that's not the point... the point is.. i don't quite have one. i just can't sleep la. i was in bed with my head drumming with a headache and i thought i'll plop off, until stirring thoughts find their way to disrupt good ol' rest. damn my mind! aiya, i shall heed good ol' advice and adhere to peace, goodness, perseverance and yadayada and hope it'll be enough. haha who am i kidding, it's alwayssss enough. but funny thing is, this eventful night strikes a tender chord because to feel the effects of depleting trust, you have to care enough. and that accounts perhaps for the subtlest of signs and the beginning of new efforts. is is so hard to tellll???? i care i care i careeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee anyway, in the spirit of this trusty business, i would love to say (ahahaha as if u all don't know already) that i sayanggg you all like i sayang... ______(aiya, you filll in this simile la) now now kids, study hard and take care, till friday! muackkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk mysterious me... |